Life as a food. lol

Well. i must say there's never a day without a weird convo with me and my homies. todays topic is......DRUMROLL!...
LIFE AS FOOD! lol so here is a list of foods that it would be cool (or not so cool) to be!
It has been agreed that the top food is: WATERMELON SEED.
why would it be cool to be one?
1.watermelon seeds get to swim forever without getting all wrinkly!
2. if you are a watermelon seed you don't have to go to school
3. even though you don't have to go to school, you get to see your friends all the time
4. (unless you're a white watermelon seed or just unlucky) you dont get eaten like you would if you were watermelon.
5. when people have seed spitting contests, its like getting shot out of a cannon!
why not?
1. if you are a white watermelon seed (unlikely, but hey!) you'rer gonna get eaten
2. if you get missed by a watermelon eater, you're gonna get bit, cracked, then have you and your bitter guts spit out
3. once people spit you out, you either get thrown away or trampled.
4. if you have a failure of a seed-spitter, you get to dribble down their chin in a pool of spit.
i think the pros are worth the risk of the cons.

now for a not so awesome food.
an ACTUAL WATERMELON
why would it be cool to be one?
1. you taste good.
2. you have pretty colors.
why not?
1. you're handicapped. if people don't take care of you, you die.
2. its like the witch with hansel and gretel, but there's no one to distract a hungry watermelon owner. when you get big and yummy looking, you die
3. when you die, it isn't peaceful. you get chopped open (most of the time into bits) then your insides get scooped out.
4. your babies (seeds) are like sea turtles. very few make it to adulthood. lol

ONWARDS!
i WAS going to blog about my evil mastermind (they aren't really evil or mastermind-like lol) plans. then i figured that i shouldn't try to explain things that i don't even have planned out myself. there are so many complications involved.
ITS LIKE A THURSDAY TODAY SINCE I HAVE FRIDAY OFF!! YIPPEE!

i think its time for a quick segment of...MENTAL. (lol do you get the joke in the title?)
last time on MENTAL our hero (or villan? or average kid?) was planning the death of a friend. today, she will be battling LOVE (or something similar).....

hmm. i'm finding out who a lot of people like lately...i wonder who clara likes? i wonder who anna likes? i wonder who melissa likes?
BC: blah blah blah pinnochio :D
...okkkkkaaayyyyy...
ALLEY: blah blah blah sattelite <3yes.>
ME: its a secret >:/
EVERYONE ELSE: TELLL MMEEEE! i promise i wont tell anyone!
ok. ok. hmm lets see. circles. how to lead them in circles.....ugh. why do they care so much?! too bad i can't just tell them. not with the lovely little hole i dug for myself by denying it...dang it.
ME: no. don't you understand the word S-E-C-R-E-T?
(slight mental spaz attack)
EVERYONE ELSE: fine...pooper.
yeah thats right. go away. go away and sulk because i'm not going to tell you! >:)

and that concludes this segment of MENTAL.

well, i think that's pretty much it. i'll keep you posted. (lol i'm punny!)

i wish I were a watermelon seed...
~helcar ;P